If [our son] had been killed, we would have been first informed by a visit - in dress blues - from a condolence team typically consisting of two Marines and one Navy Chaplain.   We know many families who've received that knock on the  door.   No  letter  is  required.   No words  are  required.   A simple  peek through  the view  hole  in the door and  the sigh of dress blue blouses,  white covers  and  white gloves tells you  all  you  ever  need  to  know.   A letter  of condolence from the SecDef is,  honestly,  not even worth opening.   Families are much more interested in hearing from the men who served with their son and  from  their families.  We  share the constant  knowledge and fear  that it could be  our door bell  being rung.   Sec. Rumsfeld  doesn't  know  our  son. He's a Lance Corporal.   He directs a machine gun team.  He is a vital link in the line  that protects  our way of  life.   He doesn't  fight  for his country,  he doesn't fight for the SecDef,  he doesn't even fight for his mom and dad.   He fights for the guys on either side of him and for his team.  He fights to secure his objective of  the moment,  which he may or may not  understand or agree with.   Sec. Rumsfeld doesn't need to  take time from  his day to  sign a  form letter of condolence and  he certainly doesn't  need to take time  to figure out what the LCpl.  was doing when  he was killed or what kind of a man he was. His  job is to  make sure  the LCpl.  didn't  die in  vain and  that only as  few LCpl's as possible will have to die to end this war in a successful manner.

 Don't get  me wrong,  we  would  appreciate the  condolence letter  from  the SecDef,  as  well  as one  from the  White House  and from  our  Senator  and Representative,  from the Mayor and Governor.  But none  would bring back our son.  And they are  all form letters,  signatures be damned.  A letter from his 1stSgt.,  from  the  men  we  know  in his unit would  be a treasure  and  a comfort.
 
 I don't  know what  happens in  other branches,  or even other units.   But in 2/4,  I know the 1stSgt's  personally contact  the surviving family with letters, emails and phone calls of condolence.

 By the way,  we know families of  fallen Marines  who've  been flown  to sites where President Bush was speaking.   He met  with  them  privately  after  his event,  never any press coverage,  and the families have said that - after being given an agenda for their time with the President and being told  that he's on a very  tight schedule - Mr. Bush  talked to every  family member  as long  as they  wanted  to  talk,   never  hurried  anyone,   cried  with  family,   hugged everyone  and they  all felt like  he had nothing  else to do  for the rest of  the day  but bring  comfort to them.   For that,  George W. Bush  has my  eternal respect  and  gratitude.   And  there  was  NEVER  one  word of publicity sur- rounding any of these meetings with families.   (I  have  pictures  to  dissuade doubters.)
 
 Bottom line, we support Sec Rumsfeld.  The people who are making a big deal about this have their heads up their collective a****.  They need to have a serious priority check on what people in positions of responsibility should be doing with their time.  They should also chat with some military families if they could figure out how to contact them.

 Semper Fi,
 Joe Cobos
 MSgt. USMC (Ret)